


Collateral Damages

by nxriamartin (NMartin)



Category: La casa de papel | Money Heist (TV)
Genre: F/M, Romance, Sex, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Translation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-12-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:48:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27458998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NMartin/pseuds/nxriamartin
Summary: Far from the capital, Raquel never imagined she'd experience again what love is. She was too busy rebuilding her life, creating a home in the middle of the country. But then, he changed everything. He appeared from nowhere, in the middle of an empty road, with a grey car and his large glasses. But then soon he turned into the man she'd love for the rest of her life.Or that's what she thought until the heist started.
Relationships: Raquel Murillo/Professor | Sergio Marquina
Comments: 14
Kudos: 30





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Daños Colaterales](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26883082) by [nxriamartin (NMartin)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NMartin/pseuds/nxriamartin). 



> Hi! This work is a translation of Daños Colaterales, my own work that I'm working on translate so that English-speakers can read it. There are already 7 chapters in the Spanish story, but I'm working hard to get the story translated as soon as possible! I'll be updating regularly. Happy reading, and don't forget to leave a comment or kudos if you liked it!

_ “I'm that bad type, make your mama sad type, make your girlfriend mad tight, might seduce your dad type, I'm the bad guy, duh.” _

Raquel sang along with the loud music, driving through the narrow roads and skillfully avoiding the small but many bumps of the old pavement. She had become used to the bleak paths she drove through every day and the sound of the dirt against the tires. The woman looked at the rear of the pickup truck through the mirror, making sure that the huge wooden planks and pallets were still in place and didn’t smash the food bags next to them. Having her weekly shopping ruined would be dreadful. She let herself go and decided to enjoy the moment of loneliness, turning up the volume and singing louder. She’d do the same thing every time she was alone in the car, taking the chance and singing along rock songs until her voice gave out. Paula’s music taste was quite the opposite of hers, the child preferred to listen to whatever song that was viral on TikTok that week. If they didn’t listen to the songs that played repeatedly on the radio she’d become upset and whine every two minutes about her mother’s taste in music being boring— she could be irritating sometimes, but Raquel loved her too much to care. The woman took a turn and made her way uphill, ignoring the half hidden sign that indicated it was a private property. That road crossed a vineyard that belonged to a famous businessman, but was the only way to get to her house. This let her observe the men working on the land almost every day as she got home. The humble woman couldn’t afford a mansion with a pool or many acres of land like the people that lived around her family, but she did not want that kind of lifestyle. Her salary combined with her savings were more than enough to buy the small cottage between vineyards, and she had been working on it for months now. She had planted tomatoes, lettuces and carrots in a vegetable garden and bought a metal swimming pool so that her daughter and mother could cool off during the summer months. That would be the only luxury they'd be able to enjoy for a while. She opened the glove box and took her sunglasses, putting them on before taking the last turn to get home. The sun hit her face and she slowed down before parking, smiling at the woman that sat down on a chair and read a gossip magazine.

“Hi, mom.” she greeted her as she jumped out of the vehicle.

“Hi sweetheart, how did it go?”

“Lots of people, as usual.” the woman sighed, sitting down next to her and closing her eyes in a dramatic way. “It’s the last time I go to the city center to do the shopping. Between the assholes that cross when it’s red and the ones that got their driving license in a raffle, I almost died ten times.”

“I don’t know why you still go there, there are many supermarkets much nearer… And don’t take it wrong, but the point of coming to live here is getting away from the city.”

“I know mom, but I had to go to José’s shop to pick up the pallets. I just couldn’t ask him to bring them here, you know. He already did enough by keeping them until I could go pick them up.”

“Pallets?”

“To make some garden benches… He came to mount the pool, do you remember? And he said he had some pallets that he wouldn’t use, and I planned to pick them up and paint them…”

“Oh, yeah. Of course. On Thursday.”

_ It was on Monday…  _ Raquel sighed, knowing it would be useless to try and correct the woman. After standing up she walked past her towards the entrance of the house, making a stop to take the chance to give her mother a kiss on the cheek and pet the small ball of fur that slept on the woman’s lap. Negrita smiled— the small terrier would only let her pet her when she was on top of Mariví. She was soon distracted by loud barks, the three labrador dogs surrounding her and asking for her attention. “You’re too jealous.” she told them, taking her time to pet them and receive smiles and content licks on her hands in response. She walked towards the door as best as she could with the dogs running around her, opened the door and moved the doorstop so that it would be open while she unloaded the bags. “Down… down.” she muttered every time the dogs got on the pickup truck, thinking they’re going on a trip. “Luna, get down!” she told the dog, receiving a bark in response. “Hey, don’t talk back.” she reproached, making the dog bark a second time. “Well, you will not be coming on a walk this evening.” She picked up a box and walked towards the kitchen, repeating the process a few times. She ignored her constant back pains, wondering if buying and renovating the house had been a good idea.

They had moved in just six months before, right after the trial in which the ex inspector had gotten Paula’s full custody. She wanted to get out of the country and move into the United Kingdom, but knew that it was impossible due to Mariví’s situation— she couldn’t make the woman travel so far away and into a country where she wouldn’t be able to communicate with anyone. After an exhausting research they finally decided on a small land placed in Toledo, far enough from the city to be discrete but not too far to be unable to have a normal life. It was a small cottage that perfectly contrasted with the large mansions and small palaces with yards and yards of land around them— in the past it had been the living space of the vineyard workers. The woman did not envy those families that arrived at the houses in luxurious cars and organized parties a few times a month. She was happy with her small vegetable garden and the house renovations she had been doing for a while now. She looked around her while putting the yogurt inside the fridge. The kitchen was large, with an island that they used for breakfast or to leave the shopping bags on it. It was also much newer than the rest of the house, the room they had invested the most time and money on. Raquel just couldn’t be more proud of how it had turned out. The wooden furniture contrasted with the stone walls, and had a rustic yet modern touch that she loved so much.

Once she had finished unloading the shopping and putting it in the fridge, she decided to also unload all the pallets before fatigue and laziness took over her body. She made sure the headscarf she was wearing was tied properly and walked across the garden one last time. The three dogs had lost all interest in her, although the oldest of them looked at her with interest from her usual spot under a tree.  _ Always watching,  _ Raquel thought. Unloading them occupied most of her day, and when she was about to rest she already had to go get Paula at school. She took a quick shower, then put on another of her basic tank tops and comfortable jeans. She put on a bandana and took the car keys, walking downstairs. “I’m going to get Paula. There are cannelloni in the fridge, if you see we’re not here on time microwave them and have dinner, okay? Love you” she told the old woman that now enjoyed the soft afternoon breeze on the balcony. She had also left a note on the door of the fridge with the same message. Mariví smiled, not really paying attention to her. She was lost in her thoughts and stared at the horizon, something she did too much these days. Raquel couldn’t blame her for getting so focused on the view, they could see the mountains from there and the city near them. The detective would still be amazed by it every morning. Her routine was the same every weekday: she’d take Paula to school, do the shopping if necessary and then get back home. There she would cook, spend the afternoon working on her garden and resting, then getting Paula from school or a friend’s house. During weekends they would do family trips to nearby towns or go to the capital to spend the day, sometimes even watch movies or go to the theatre. Mariví and Paula loved musicals. Whenever she was too tired, Mariví stayed at home so mother and daughter would go to the capital’s theme park. Mariví still could be home alone, as long as any sharp objects would be locked in the kitchen drawer. Raquel would insist on never staying at home, as she wanted her daughter to forget her parents divorce as soon as possible.

The detective enjoyed driving, as it gave her the opportunity to shut up her intrusive thoughts. She was known for always overanalyzing everything, even her own feelings. Everything that happened in her life was quickly stored in her mind until she thought about all its details. Divorcing Alberto had been the best thing she had ever done. It had given her back the freedom she had lost many years ago, even if i t had also caused her to leave Madrid. People kept talking about her, even when she was long gone. Many thought of her as a coward who had run away from a problematic relationship, someone who didn’t want to face a bad period of her marriage. Others knew that Alberto had cheated on her with her sister and even had kept the secret from her— she was quick and took these people out of her life. Very little did actually believe and support her, but once she left she lost contact with most of them. In the end, she knew that everyone judged her one way or another. She remembered the looks they gave her when she’d enter the station with red marks on her face, the awkward silences when Alberto and her would accidentally be in one room at the same time. Everyone else would suddenly find excuses to go somewhere else. The many text messages that implied they had seen the man having dinner with another woman. She sighed, she had already gotten over all that— or at least she thought so. She turned the blinker on and turned to the secondary road that ended at the neighboring town. A blue car passed her and soon got lost in the woods.

It was then when she heard a sound coming from the front of the car as she took the narrow turn a few meters away from the main road. The loud roar of the engine and the following silence left her frozen, unable to believe what was happening. “No, no, no, no. Don’t fuck with me.” she complained, staring at the cloud of smoke that escaped the hood of the car. “Fuck.” she turned the engine off and walked out of the vehicle, the small column of black smoke getting more and more dense. She approached the car again, taking her purse and her phone out of it— the screen did not turn on, and soon she realized it had no battery at all.  _ You’re so fucking stupid, Raquel. So, so fucking stupid. Yeah play some music while you clean and just don’t charge the phone at all, that works just fine. And you fucking knew the car had to be replaced, that it would leave you hanging any day. And you don’t charge the fucking phone, because you’re such an idiot. Fucking idiot. _

* * *

She had been waiting for half an hour when she finally saw a car approaching the spot she had been waiting in. “Hey!” she yelled, raising her arms. The reflecting vest she wore probably helped make the driver see her, since the grey car started to slow down until it came to a stop right in front of her. The tinted window rolled down a few centimeters and the woman could only take a peek of the reflection of the man’s glasses. The stranger was probably her only chance of getting help. “Hi, hello. Look, my car broke down there in the turn, and the engine is not working. I wanted to call for help but my phone died before I could warn anyone…” she explained. “I only need to call the insurance company and they’ll call the lorry.”

“Yes, of course. Where do you have the car?”

“Right there... after the turn back there. You’ll see the triangles.”

“Okay. Look, I’m going to turn around right there,” he said, pointing forward, “and then I’ll park in front of your car. Gimme two minutes.”

Raquel looked at the car as it moved further away, only to turn and immediately make its way towards her car. She walked back to her own vehicle and started putting the car papers in order while the man completely stopped in front of her. He walked out of the vehicle and she could finally study his appearance— he seemed to be more or less her age, with a beard and dark hair. He wore large black glasses. “I’d say good afternoon, but that’d be unfortunate as it doesn’t seem that good at all.” he spoke with a gentle smile.

“Yeah.”

“What happened?”

“The engine, it just broke down and there was all this smoke that came from it.”

“Looks bad. And you couldn’t call, right?”

“No, my phone is completely dead. I have the bad habit of not checking how much battery it has before leaving…”

“Don’t worry, you can use my charger. Try and connect it in the USB port of my car.”

“Let’s see... Cable fits, yeah. You don’t mind me charging it a few minutes?”

“No, not at all. Go and call, I’m gonna check if the engine can be restarted.”

“Thank you, really… Oh, crap. I didn’t even introduce myself. I’m Raquel.”

“I’m Salvador.” the man said as he took off his jacket and left it in his car. “Salvador Martín.”


	2. Chapter 2

“Yes, perfect. Thank you.” Raquel said as she spoke on the phone, her eyes following Salvador as he worked on trying to get the engine restarted. As his name foretold, he had become the person who saved her from becoming stranded in a completely empty road. She couldn’t lie, it was difficult to concentrate on what the person on the other side of the line said while the man was standing there. She blamed him and his large arms, now completely exposed as he had taken his jacket and shirt off. She had watched him leave them perfectly folded on the passenger seat before walking towards her car, following each of his movements with her eyes. Sitting on the driver’s seat of his car with her feet outside, she bit her lip as she studied the sweat that fell down his arms. She didn’t even remember how much time had passed since she had been touched. She missed the caresses and physical contact of a man— she remembered now, it had been two years since her last night with Alberto. She sighed, hypnotized by the man’s biceps. He dried the droplets of sweat from his forehead with his arm before starting to move more of the engine pieces, focused on doing whatever he was doing— Raquel did not know anything about cars, except how to drive them. And right now, she did not care about her car, too focused on the veins of the man’s arms. None of her colleagues had the physique the man had, not even Suárez. It made her wonder what was the man’s occupation. He could not be a cop like her, he did not have the attitude she was used to see from the men around her. He did not look like a construction worker either, nor had the looks of a guy who spent hours at the gym. She kept staring at him, moving her eyes from his arms to his back, then lowering her stare to his butt.  _ Not bad. Not bad at all… _

“Well, I am no expert but it doesn’t look like it’s going to work anymore…” Salvador spoke loudly, making sure the woman would hear him as he spoke. Raquel’s mind came back to the real world. She had even tilted her head, losing the notion of how much time had passed as she looked at him, but luckily he didn’t seem to have noticed. He turned around at the same time her eyes went up and their gaze met— he smiled at her, not knowing what thoughts she had just been having. He walked towards her and sighed. “Long story short, the engine’s lifetime is over. The car seems to be quite old, from the 2000s… Am I wrong?”

“Not at all. I think it’s from that year, it must be twenty years old. My husband bought it— my  _ ex  _ husband.” she corrected herself quickly, still not used to mentioning Alberto as her ex and not just her husband. In the end, their divorce had only become official half a year ago, despite them being living apart much more time.

“I have an old car too, from the nineties. It’s old and makes an awful sound when I turn it on,to be honest, but I don’t have the heart to replace it. At least not until it’s completely necessary. They don’t make cars that last that long anymore.” he explained distractedly as he walked past the woman and opened the trunk of his car. Raquel turned her head, watching him take a piece of cloth and dried the sweat from his arms. He didn’t know it, but as soon as he started doing so Raquel stopped paying attention to anything else but him. It was as if a flame inside of her was ignited, burning her. She turned her face and looked forward again, realizing he was starting to take off his undershirt. She didn’t want to be weird in front of him, or even creepy. She resisted the urge of peeking and see if he looked as good without the shirt on, not wanting to invade his privacy. He walked away around the car, opening the passenger door and started to get dressed again— she got slightly disappointed. “Did you use it a lot?” the man wondered, speaking from behind her. “I’ve seen it doesn’t have a high mileage.”

“No, I didn’t use it much.” Raquel looked over her own shoulder for a moment, checking if he was finally dressed. He was actually walking around the car and towards her, fixing the collar of his shirt. Raquel smiled at the detail of him checking it was perfectly placed a few times. “My ex used it much more, but he bought another one and gave me this one. I only used it to get my kid from school.”

“You have kids?”

“One daughter, Paula. She’s eight.” Raquel smiled, holding the phone towards him to show him the screen as best as she could with the phone still connected to the cable. Her background was a picture of Raquel and Paula posing for a selfie at the zoo, with the lions behind them. Surprisingly, they were one of the girl’s favorite animals, with dolphins and unicorns. “I was actually going to school to get her when the car broke down.”

“Oh, did you get to call the school saying you’ll be late?”

“There was no need, luckily one of the other moms realized I was not getting there, tried to call me and then texted me saying she was staying with her for a bit. I’ve texted her back and asked her to let Paula stay with them tonight, because if I have to solve this, go home, take the other car and all that… Well, she owed me a favor, so that’s it. Good thing about smaller towns, we all know and help each other.”

“Yeah, country life has that. Does she study in the town at the end of the road? The small one with the ruined church, I don’t remember the name.”

“Yeah, it’s that one. I didn't want to drive a full hour to the capital to just bring her to school and then come back, it doesn’t make sense. But tomorrow it’s gonna be hard to drive around the town with the pick up truck…”

“Truck? You have a company or something?”

“No, a neighbor lent it to me so I could use it for the move, but then he told me he didn’t really want it and sold it to me. The car is not the best thing to drive around the mountain— obviously. But then, the truck is not the best thing to drive around the town… So I have to use both.” Raquel shrugged, then stood up. She did not want to be sitting in the man’s car while he had to stand in front of her, it felt somehow rude. Moving her arms and stretching her body, she started walking on the side of the road. They spent a few moments in complete silence, enjoying the few sounds nature gave them while she walked back and forth. The man seemed to be quite quiet and solemn, a seriousness that to Raquel seemed too strange coming from someone her age. In that moment she realized they had been stranded there for a while, and Salvador didn’t seem to be eager to get to his destination.

“What do you do for a living? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Oh, don’t worry, you can ask anything you want. After all I asked too.” he answered, smiling at her again. His smile was genuine and warm, but also a little timid. He looked socially clumsy, despite his words denoted confidence. “I’m a teacher.”

“A teacher?”

“Yeah, at University Carlos III.”

“Oh, university teacher.” the woman nodded.  _ That makes sense, he doesn’t look like a kindergarten teacher.  _ “Were you on your way to class?”

“No, not at all. I don’t have classes today. My schedule is kind of weird and leaves me lots of free hours so I was taking the chance to just run some errands. Last week I ordered some paint cans and I was going to pick them up, but I can go later when I come from the new house, I’m renovating it.”

“Are you moving?”

“No. If everything goes well, next year I’ll open a winery.”

“You’ll have troubles getting in the local market, since there are a thousand wineries around here.” she laughed, mocking the lack of originality from the other.  _ If they gave me a euro for every winery there is in the area, I’d have enough money to buy one of them,  _ Raquel thought to herself while she analysed the man in silence. Now less focused in his muscles and more in the details of his clothing and movements, it was clear that the man was not one of the wealthy owners of the wineries— she was sure she had seen that same suit when she went shopping in the capital. But his relatively new car made it clear that he was privileged, at least more than her.  _ He owns a vineyard, he obviously has money. He’s just another guy who will benefit from the workers that live here,  _ she judged him in silence. Salvador moved his glasses up against his nose and walked towards her, resting his back against the side of the car.

“I don’t care about the other wineries, mine is just a hobby.”

“I had never thought wineries could be a hobby.” the woman swallowed hard. “I think it’s not a common one.”

“Well, even the more ordinary people can be extraordinary.”

“I’m sure you are not ordinary.”

“And I’m sure you’re not either.”


	3. Chapter 3

_ “I’m sure you are not ordinary.” _

_ “And I’m sure you’re not either.” _

Raquel turned to look at the man, smiling at the compliment he had smoothly returned to her. There was something about him that had her spellbound, something that made her heartbeat faster and harder to breathe. The combination of an attractive physical appearance and a quick mind was something that always captivated her, and he seemed to be exactly that. She had to sum up a confidence that was impossible to see at first and that only seemed to show in crucial moments, taking her by surprise every time it showed. Salvador looked at her too, his piercing eyes on her. It made her feel overwhelmed somehow, as she would have sworn that those eyes that looked at her so piercingly now reflected calm and even shyness. The man’s mouth opened slightly, and Raquel swore she could see his breathing heavying too. It made her wonder, was he thinking the same thing as her? Was it possible he also wanted to kiss her? Was it possible that the attraction she felt was mutual? She didn’t dare to ask, and he didn’t seem to have any intention of doing so. They stayed in the same position for what seemed an eternity, lost in each other's eyes. Time didn’t seem to pass around them, the two of them too captivated in the other’s stare. The inspector swallowed, her mouth was suddenly dry.

It was then when he looked down, focusing on her lips, and she finally realized: it was now or never.

She took him by the collar of his shirt, in a swift movement that left him startled as she pulled from him and moved closer. Standing on her tiptoes and leaning on the side of the car, she put her face to his level and kissed him passionately, closing her eyes and praying that a miracle happened. She prayed for the kiss to be reciprocal, but it didn't seem it was. It took her a few seconds to notice any kind of reaction from the man, who finally was moving his hands in signal of surprise, not knowing where to put them. His lips were still, a sign of doubt that made Raquel come back to the harsh reality.  _ You're making a mistake, Raquel,  _ a little voice said in her thoughts, understanding his doubt as a rejection. She had always hated that little voice, it was annoying and called her out too many times. It gave her too much common sense, and made her miss too many opportunities. It was a voice stronger than her heart, that won many battles against it. And it won this battle too. The woman opened her eyes and quickly moved away from the man, watching him stand there, confused. "I'm so sorry, I…" she started apologizing, looking at him with a mix of sadness and shame in her eyes. Adrenaline still ran through her body, tainting her cheeks red and creating the same stomach-turning sensation she felt when she was riding a roller-coaster. She looked away, afraid of the dumbfounded professor. "I— I don't know what just happened, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, really.”

“No… no need to apologize.”

“No, I must apologize. This was completely wrong, I kissed you without your consent and that is extremely important. I didn't know if you'd want to, and of course you don't want to, I ju—”

"Shut up."

He placed his big hands on her hips and pushed her against the car, pressing her body against the door as he kissed her back. Now the dumbfounded one was her, who almost comically mimicked his previous movements. His kiss was much more forceful than hers, and that force was what made Raquel understand that the attraction was mutual. Falling into the magic of the kiss, she put her hands on the man’s cheeks and pulled him even closer. He took that as an approval to deepen the kiss, moving his tongue into her mouth and brushing it against hers. Raquel moaned against his lips, intoxicated by the sudden and passionate kiss. It made her fly, she was convinced the man’s mouth tasted like heaven. She had to admit it, the way the man kissed her was amazing— she was surprised once more, as she would have never imagined how much talent he had. The man was truly a box of surprises, and every time she thought she knew something about him she’d encounter the reality of being constantly proven wrong. From having an amazing body under his librarian looks and great confidence when moving his tongue, there was nothing ordinary about Salvador. The thought of what he could do with his tongue made her squirm— maybe not that day, but someday she’d have his mouth between her legs. She was sure of it, even if it meant to put her ‘no dating’ rule on hold for a while. All thoughts were put aside when she noticed Salvador’s leg between her own, pressing her core with his thigh as he bit her lip. There was nothing she enjoyed more than when a man knew how to touch a woman, and Salvador knew exactly what she liked. She could notice, they both shared the need to keep on going. He stopped kissing her for a moment and she sighed, immediately missing the touch of his lips. Lost in the silence that surrounded them and the color of his eyes, she didn’t even dare to speak. Salvador didn’t either, none wanted to break that moment. But they had to, and he was the one to murmur something, his voice much lower than minutes before and his breathing extremely heavy.

“How much time do we have?”

“Enough.”

It wasn’t true, and both knew it. But they didn’t care, they even liked the idea. They shared the same need of adrenaline and wanting to race against the clock. A naughty smile appeared on Raquel’s face as she moved away from the car to open the door, winking at him. Adrenaline started to run through their veins, flooding their insides, and their pulse got faster and faster with every second that passed. They got in the car and closed the door behind them, and Raquel quickly lay down as best as she could. Ignoring how uncomfortable her posture could be, her hands searched and found him, pulling from him to start kissing him again as he squeezed her ass tightly. “Ouch.” she whined when she felt his glasses against her face. He took them off and carefully left them on one of the front seats, turning to look at her again. His eyes closed slightly, trying to focus on looking at her. He probably had really poor eyesight, which would be adorable if he didn’t look even more attractive like this. The jacket he wore lasted only a few minutes on, since Raquel was quick to take it off of him. The same happened with his white shirt— with surprisingly skilled movements, Raquel unbuttoned it and opened it, leaving his chest bare.  _ What the hell, is he a teacher or a bodybuilder?!  _ she thought to herself as she admired him, watching him lean back and discard the shirt on the floor of the car. He then signaled for her to take off her own shirt, and she obeyed in silence. She didn’t wear bras regularly, and today was not an exception. Salvador admired the curves of her body for a few moments, just to take her hand and pull from her, making her shift positions. She moved without saying a word, taking off her pants before sitting on his lap— she knew taking them off would be convenient just moments later. She thought about folding them and leaving them at hand, just in case someone came, but she finally left them on the floor of the car and got on top of him, pressing her lips against his immediately. His fingers ran through her hair and pulled from it softly, making her put her face up and leave him enough room to start kissing her neck. A soft moan escaped her lips as he kissed her, her jaw, her neck, her shoulder. Her chest. This time she moaned loudly, holding herself on the headrest as she looked down and saw his tongue circling around her nipple. She rolled her eyes, noticing how as his mouth was busy with one of her breasts his fingers played with the other. This could be a quick fuck, but it was clear Salvador didn’t forget about foreplay. He showed as much passion in his actions that in a matter of seconds he had been able to bring the woman’s libido back to life— a fire inside of her that her ex husband had tried to kill for years. It was incredible what this was doing to her. Because yes, it was all a consequence of adrenaline and excitement, it was sex that was born far from any rational thought. But it was still sex. Sex in a car, in an empty and narrow road.

“Salvador, do you have a condom?” Raquel asked suddenly.

“I think we can drop the formalities already. Call me Salva.”

“Sorry.” Raquel laughed. “I’m already used to it.”

“I mean you can call me Salvador if you want…”

“If I’m going to be honest, I really don’t care what to call you, as long as you have a condom.”

He laughed at the not so subtle comment and took out a confom from his pocket, making the woman raise a brow at how opportune it was. She didn’t give it much more of a thought, she was too horny to care. She rested her weight on her knees against the seat, letting him move under her and take off his pants more easily. Once the piece of clothing could not annoy them and the man was done with the condom, he pulled her down softly as she reached for his member and guided him. Closing her eyes as he entered her, she prepared for the sweet instant the pain would become pleasure. She moved her body up and down slowly, not opening her eyes and enjoying the sensation. She didn’t know, but Salvador kept his eyes on her and observed her movements with hunger, admiring the beauty of the sweat droplets that ran down her skin and the way she bit her lip. His hands guided her to synchronize their movements and he moved his hips, letting out a groan.  _ Fuck, Salva,  _ she thought in response to it. She sighed, opening her eyes and starting to move faster, looking at him with a vicious smile on her face. She needed him to be rougher. And he seemed to understand her, pushing against her harder and deeper, making her moans much louder. They could feel the car move with the, but they didn’t care— they were too busy feeling each other. They didn’t care if anyone drove down the road and saw them, they felt invincible. Raquel leaned against him, putting around him as he held her, letting him guide her. She wouldn’t last much longer, she was sure of it. Salva seemed to know that too, as his erratic movements became more and more precise and seemed to do exactly what she needed. “Fuck, Salva!”

She opened her eyes and found about the hard truth. She was in her bed.

Covered in sweat, and alone.


	4. Chapter 4

“Fucking hell.” the woman groaned and hit the mattress with her fist. Two weeks had passed since her old car had broken down, and life went on— the new car keys were on her nightstand, right next to the alarm clock that signaled it was six in the morning, and her daughter’s drawings hung from the wall to fill the emptiness left by the pictures of her ex husband. The erotic dreams had become recurent and always involved Salvador, which made her more and more frustrated. She turned in her bed, muffling another groan against the pillow. There were many nights where she would wake up and not be able to go back to sleep, the sheets messy and her underwear soaked. More than once her vibrator had run out of batteries before the sun came out, or she had needed a cold shower before starting her day. Most nights she simply longed for someone to hug her while sleeping, or being gifted flowers from time to time. She didn’t remember how it was to feel butterflies in her stomach, but she did remember how it felt when she was in love. She missed that. Those were the worst nights, and she’d cry hugging her pillow until she fell asleep again. The last two weeks had started an internal conflict that mentally exhausted her. The possibility of meeting someone who she would actually connect with scared and amazed her equally, because even if she wanted to have a partner again, she knew idealizing a man she barely knew wasn’t healthy. She didn’t understand her fixation on the man, who at first sight hadn’t really impressed her. But in some way, Salvador had left a mark on her. And she had blown everything by not asking for his phone number.

She knew that it wasn’t entirely her fault, that their talk had been abruptly disrupted by the impolite breakdown lorry driver, but the thoughts kept punishing her. The  _ what if  _ had her restless. Raquel kept thinking that she should have called him out and then taken the chance to say goodbye to Salvador. She closed her eyes, remembering how the driver had honked at them as he turned into the road, right after Salvador telling her she was no ordinary woman. The man was short and bald, and signaled for the professor to move his car and leave some space for him. The professor had swallowed hard and smiled at her as a way to apologize, and even though it seemed he was going to say something more, he only spoke four words that ended up hitting her heart.

“See you soon, Raquel.”

She sighed, turning on the bed again and looking at the ceiling. She felt life had put the opportunity of moving on right in front of her nose, the opportunity of forgetting about Alberto with a university professor. But she didn’t feel ready, she was too afraid. She was afraid of becoming attached and depending on another man, of repeating her mistakes. Her relationship with the man had been extremely unhealthy, and she couldn’t risk her own mental health and relive something like that. She knew her heart would not be able to tolerate it, and her body wouldn’t either. Her bruises and cuts had disappeared long ago, but somehow they still hurt. She put her hand on her face, then on her ribs: the first place he hit her, and the last. She closed her eyes as if by doing that she could stop the pain that she felt every time she thought about it. She shook her head, shutting that thought out of her mind. In the end, it was time for her to start her day and start tidying the house a bit before Paula made a mess again. Walking to the bathroom, she undressed by taking off the large t-shirt she used for sleeping. Ever since she was in her teens, her mother had criticized her choice of not putting on underwear except for when it was necessary, the same way she criticized every single decision about her image she took— on which they always disagreed. Even now that she was not that much of a teenager, Mariví kept on going with her critiques. Raquel didn’t judge the woman, as her illness made it almost impossible for her to remember her daughter was an irredeemable hippie, but still tried for her feminist ideology to penetrate Paula’s mind.  _ “Look, Paula. Everyone is going to criticize everything others do. All the time. They’re stupid, and you should not care at all about their opinions. You do whatever you want and fuck other people’s opinions.”  _ she would always explain when the little girl told her about the comments her classmates made about her clothes or physique. Poor kid had broken her two front teeth and had not gotten an appointment with the dentist yet. Raquel turned on the mirror light and looked at her own reflection, just to look away a few moments later and get in the shower. She didn’t like to look at her body, and she had the feeling she never would.

* * *

“Well, I— I don’t know.” Raquel smiled widely, giving her daughter a thumbs up as her daughter showed her a bag of tomatoes. The girl had no idea, but in a few years she’d have to help much more in the house and would miss the moments of clarity her grandmother had from time to time. Maiví’s situation got worse slowly, and both her and Raquel wanted the child to create good memories with her grandmother. Maybe that way she could remember those moments for the both of them, when Mariví couldn’t. The detective’s mind went back to the conversation she was having on the phone, and she let out a giggle. “But god, I wish you had seen him. He looked like a fucking librarian.”

_ “But was he hot?” _

“So damn hot.”

_ “So you could see something under his shirt?” _

“He took the shirt off when he was fixing the engine.”

_ “I know of another engine he could fix… _ ” the woman laughed on the other side of the line.

“Dickhead.”

_ “No, I’m not a dickhead. I’m direct, smart. A bit of a whore sometimes, if you ask the wrong guys. But hey, trust me. Look him up, he’s probably on Facebook. And if there’s a god out there, you’ll have a great fuck.” _

“No...”

_ “Raquel, it’s time.” _

“You know I’m not ready yet.”

_ “Come on Raquel, it’s just sex.” _

“But I just can’t have sex without feelings involved, Ali. I’m not like you.”

_ “Hey, that sounds awful. I am not a cold hearted bitch with no feelings.” _

“Well...”

_ “I mean, I am, but that doesn’t mean I don’t feel anything when I have sex.”  _ she spoke before falling silent, a cat’s meowing filling the sudden silence.  _ “Raquel, listen. This doesn’t have anything to do with love, this is sex. Just sex. No strings attached or drama. And that is what you want: sex with no strings attached. Good sex, hard sex. A professor that looks like a librarian but is hella hot fucking you hard doesn’t sound that bad, doesn’t it?” _

“I mean not if you put it like that...”

_ “Then grow some ovaries and just do it. I told you long ago, love doesn’t have to hurt. And the same happens with sex, even if you liked to be wipped sometimes and rough sex is you thing…” _

“Fuck off, that was years ago! Why do you still bring it up?” the detective laughed, remembering the crazy things she did in her college years. She gave a quick glance around her, seeing how Mariví and Paula had walked away and now shopped in a candy store— despite Raquel telling them they could not buy candy that often, they would not listen. “You’ll never let me forget that, huh?”

_ “That’s what friends are for, to remind you all the shitty decisions you’ve made in life.” _

This time aquel did not laugh, staring towards the figure that moved among the people. She saw him from far away, standing out from all those that surrounded him. He wore a similar suit to the one he had worn two weeks before, although this time he also wore a tie and carried a briefcase. The tie was dark red and had no pattern, just as sober as his appearance. He waved at someone near him and then paid for the bread he seemed to be buying. He picked a huge bag full of baguettes from the baker’s hands and then went to another stand, repeating the process as he shopped around the market. He seemed to be doing some of his weekly shopping. Raquel kept her attention on him, and her heart skipped a beat every time she saw him smile. Her mouth was dry and her eyes were wide, unable to believe what she was seeing. She shook her head, coming back to reality. “Okay, Ali, go feed your favorite redhead, I can hear him meowing and telling you he's hungry. And I’ve got to go, I…” she swallowed hard, trying to think of an excuse quickly. “I have to tell Paula not to convince my mother to buy another doll. And I just can’t have another fucking Disney princess doll that I have to dress and undress however Paula says. Call you tomorrow?”

_ “Too busy with a case, I’ll call you when I’m free.” _

“Okay.”

_ “And stop being lazy and finish the house already. Germán and I want to go visit.” _


End file.
